READ BETWEEN THE LINES

When I was in school, there was a popular saying going around among the students. “Read Between The Lines.” As you said the words, you held up three fingers with the middle finger being in the middle of the other two, like three lines. When you read between the lines you would discover you were being given the middle finger.

That was a childish game, but I’ve seen adults use it and I used it myself into my late teens, occasionally. But there’s an adult version still kicking around today, but it is a little different. Something is said, and someone else “reads between the lines.” What that means is they’re discovering what the person who spoke really meant but didn’t actually say.

Now occasionally, there are instances where people will say something with camouflaged or hidden meanings that they want someone to know without actually having to say it plainly, but most of the time, when we read between the lines we’re not discovering anything new or extra that the person was thinking but didn’t say, we’re only thinking they said something they didn’t say and didn’t even think.

When we read between the lines, we’re actually projecting our own thoughts and feelings into something someone else said. It’s very likely that what we think we’re discovering between the lines is only our thinking, and has absolutely nothing to do with what the person actually said or thought. In reality, most of the time, I think we’re actually discovering what we think, and feel about the subject being presented.

You may not think you have ever been guilty of reading between the lines because you didn’t think that was what you were doing at the time, but have you ever had someone say to you “That’s not what I said?” You misunderstood what they said. Maybe that was an instance of reading between the lines.

I’ve actually been on both sides of this subject where I thought someone meant something they didn’t mean when they actually didn’t, and I’ve had people think something I said meant something it didn’t mean when I was talking. Our reaction in a situation like this can actually ruin relationships, friendships, and family ties.

So, in the future, let’s think about that before we read between the lines and if we think someone meant something they didn’t actually say, we should talk about it and discuss it with them, in a kind loving way. Not in a mean-spirited manner or a condescending way. We need to be kind, always. Sometimes I’m sure we’ll actually find that they did mean what we thought they meant but didn’t actually say, but most of the time, I think we’ll find that they didn’t mean anything more than what they actually said. We can preserve our relationships by discussing misunderstandings in a respectful, loving way.

Let’s not leave God out of the situation either. Always pray before you talk to someone about some conflict, and make sure God is with you to help with what you say, and how you react. Relationships are very important, so we have to be intentional in preserving them.

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IF I COULD GO BACK IN TIME

Have you ever heard someone say, “I wish I knew then what I know now,” or, “I wish I could go back and live my life over, knowing what I know now?” Maybe you’ve even said something like that yourself. I know I have. I’ve always had a very active imagination, so I’ve imagined countless scenarios about going back in time as I was growing up.

I’ve always loved science fiction. It offers endless possibilities for the mind to wonder. I especially love the concepts of space travel and time travel. Space travel is a little more within our grasp than time travel, but even it has limitations.

I do believe there are other inhabited planets in the billions of galaxies out there, but the chance of us ever reaching them is very small. Time travel is even more impossible, but I’ve found myself wishing I could go back in time on several occasions.

One of my favorite back in time imaginings always involved going back and doing something to make myself rich in the future. I’ve thought of buying some things in the past that I know are worth a lot of money now; Things like comic books, baseball cards, paintings, and other collectibles. I would bring them back with me if I could, but if I couldn’t, I would hide them somewhere that I knew would still be there when I got back, then I would cash in; 

I also thought about changing the past to make the present better, not just for me, but for all my family, and community, our state, and even our whole world. If I could go back in time I would change so much. There are many, many things I would do, but, there are more things that I would NOT do than things I would. There are so many scenarios with the theory of time travel, and so many variables depending on who writes the story, but I would love to go back as I am now and see just what I could do, and what I could change. Maybe even find my younger self and give him some guidance to help him become the man I always wanted to be someday.

After many years of entertaining the idea, I’ve mellowed a bit, and grown some intellectually, and spiritually, and I think if time travel was possible I would do things a bit differently than I had always daydreamed about. Of all my imaginings, I think I would like most to go back to when I was twelve years old and live my life over from there with all the knowledge I now have, including all my memories from the life I have already lived.

Before I tell you what I would do, let me first tell you what I would not do. I would not jump on the tree knot one more time after my grandmother told me to stop, and my leg would not get the skin peeled off the bone from my knee to my foot. I would not take my new basketball to school and it would not get stolen from me. I would say, No, when Arlan asked me to draw the hand with only a middle finger sticking up on his notebook.

I would not grab that tennis racket in math class and clown around behind Mr. Jobe’s desk knocking the light fixture down, and I would not get a paddling because of it. I would do my homework and never copy Lisa’s, and Debbie’s papers. The day I was being chased through the gym, I would not duck and run through the line of girls doing basketball drills. That way, I would not end up unconscious on the floor with a concussion because I ran into the wall and fell and hit my head.

I would not pick up that rat I found in the bathtub one day after church, and I would not get bitten and have to go to the hospital for a tetanus shot. I would not jump off the top of our house and hurt myself. I would not get on that horse at Jamie’s house, so the horse would not run away with me and scare me almost to death. I would not quit school after I turn 16. I would never touch a drop of alcohol, and I would never, ever try drugs even one time.

There are many bad choices I made back then that I would never make if I had the opportunity to choose again with the knowledge I now have. I could go on for pages, talking about the things I would not do, but I won’t. Let me tell you a few of the things I WOULD do if I could go back in time and live my life over.

The first thing I would do, without hesitation, is to fall down on my knees, and ask Jesus to save me, and guide me from that moment on, for the rest of my life. I wasted so many years doing my own thing, my own way and I regret that. The second thing I would do is hug my grandmother, and tell her how much I love her, and from that point on, I would cherish everything she had to say, and I would obey her in whatever she told me, and I would treat her with the respect she truly deserved.

Then I would hug my three sisters and let them know how much I love and respect them, and that I will always love them, no matter what, and that I will always be there to protect them. I would do my very best to be a better example for them than I was. I would go tell my mom and dad that I love and respect them, and I forgive them for everything I was angry at them about. I would let them know I understand why things had to be the way they were. I would tell my Aunt Lee that I love her and I appreciate all she has done to help our grandmother take care of us. Those are the things I would do first.

I would also study more, and do my homework every night. I would read and study the Bible every day. I would spend more time praying and worshiping God and less time with my celebrity idols. I would spend more time helping others and less time satisfying my own selfish desires. I would spend more time telling others what Jesus has done for me, and how much he loves them. I would be a different young man than I was, and I would grow into a young adult that God could use. These are the things I would change if I could go back in time.

The reality of the matter is, I can’t go back in time. I can’t change a single thing that I ever did. “The Past Is The Past,” and “What’s Done Is Done.” The amazing thing is that God forgave me for all those bad things I did and he gave me a clean slate. Yes, I messed it up too, but thankfully, his mercy is new every morning. Each of us has a new opportunity each day to start over and live a better life from that point on. Jesus said, “Ask and you will receive. Search and you will find, knock and the door will be opened to you“ (Matthew 7:7). John said, If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us for our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness (1 John 1:9). Remember this if you ever find yourself wishing you could go back and change your past.

Our main focus should not be on the past, but on the future and the glorious gift of eternal life with our creator and savior. That shouldn’t be the reason we serve him, though. We “must be born again” in order to receive that eternal life (John 3:7). When we’re truly born again, we will serve and obey him because we love him. He loves us so much that he died for us, and if we love him, we’ll live for him.

This life will end someday, and I truly believe it won’t be long now. Life is too short to waste, and eternity with Jesus is too precious to miss out on. So please, give your life to him right now. Look to the future, and leave the past in the past.

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BETRAYED BY A FRIEND

During my ten years in Elementary School, I had several best friends. Obviously, I failed two grades, but I also attended four different schools. I lost friends because I changed schools, and I lost friends because they changed schools. I also lost friends both times I failed a grade and they moved up. We were no longer in the same room, and in a few cases, we went to lunch and recess at different times, and just grew apart.

When I was in the first grade at a school called Gift, my best friend was named Vivian. She was a tomboy and wasn’t afraid of a little dirt, or water. When I had to repeat the first grade, she move on to the second and we didn’t get to hang out together as much, and we both made new friends. Then the school closed down and she went to Kossuth and I went to Union Center.

My best friend there was Samuel. We were in the same class, and we hung out together at recess and ate lunch together every day. We were both right-handed, but I never really thought much about it at all. I knew there were left-handed people and right-handed people. That’s just the way it was. Then one day, we were sitting at the table in the lunchroom, and just out of the blue, he suggested that we both start using our left hands to eat, as he picked up some spaghetti with his fork using his left hand. I tried it and found it to be a bit difficult, but I figured I could adapt with a little practice. Then he suggested we start doing everything left-handed. I said "okay," and that’s what we did for the rest of the year.

Soon, Summer break came, which lasted about four months in those days. We didn’t see each other all that time, and when school started back, he moved on to the sixth grade and I had to repeat the fifth. Later that year, his family moved to California. They moved back a few years later and he went to Kossuth.

When I graduated from elementary school, I went to the high school at Kossuth, and there was Samuel. I didn’t get to see him much, because we were in different grades and the school was so big, and I was only there for a few months, but to my surprise, he was still using his left hand to eat. I had given that up years ago and hadn’t really thought much about it. It was a bit difficult, and without him there to encourage me, I just went back to what was comfortable.

When I failed the fifth grade, and Samuel moved on, he wasn’t the only one. All my classmates moved up to the sixth grade. The new school year began with a whole room full of new people coming from the fourth grade. That’s when I met Randy and we became best friends. A few years later, when we were in the seventh grade, he suggested that we both come to school the next day with our hair parted in the middle. I was reluctant, but I finally agreed to do it.

When I got home, I went into the bathroom and started messing with my hair to see what it would look like parted in the middle. I’ve never liked change as far back as I can remember, and when it came to my hair, that was especially true. I always kept my hair neat, and I didn’t want anyone to touch it. I even wore hairspray from my mid-teens into my thirties. Many people thought I was vain, and probably thought I was stuck up, or full of myself, but it was just the opposite. I’ve never, in my life, thought that I was handsome or good-looking. Never. I didn’t think I was ugly, but I knew I was not good-looking, so I tried my best to look as nice as I possibly could, with my clothes and hair, because I knew that’s all I had.

Anyway, I didn’t quite like the way my new hairstyle made me look that day after school, but I had told Randy I would do it, so the next morning when I got ready for school, I parted my hair in the middle. I kept messing with it and looking at it, but I just couldn’t leave it like that. I was already shy and self-conscious enough about my looks, and I couldn’t take a chance on making myself look worse, so I chickened out. So, just before the bus came, I quickly fixed my hair back the way I had been wearing it for the last few years; the way I was comfortable wearing it. Then, I got on the bus.

When the bus stopped at Randy’s house, he got on and sat down beside me with his new hairstyle. It actually looked good on him. He didn’t pressure me too much about not changing mine and never mentioned it again after that week, as far as I can remember. He just went right on wearing his fly-back hairdo.

Looking back, I feel bad about agreeing with my friends to do something and not following through with it. Those things may seem trivial but I went back on my word. I’m thankful they forgave me and didn’t hate me for it. I’m sorry I let you guys down. Thank you both for your continued friendship.

Friendship is something special. There are many good quotes and expressions out there about friendship, and there are several variations to many of them. The first one that comes to my mind is "To have a friend, you must be a friend." I’ve heard that one for as long as I can remember, and you probably have, too. Did you know it comes from the Bible? Proverbs 18:24 says, "A man that has friends must be friendly, and there is a friend that sticks closer than a brother."  

Friendship is important for many reasons. We need friends to encourage us, comfort us, and hold us accountable in certain aspects of life. Studies have even shown that friendship has positive effects on both emotional and physical health. To make friends, we have to be friendly. To keep friends, we have to be a friend. We have to be honest and reliable. That means keeping our word when at all possible. If for some reason, we can’t do something we have agreed to do, then we need to let our friends know. That’s just common courtesy and should be extended to everyone, not just friends.

We also need to be willing to forgive our friends (and others) when they hurt us, just as we would want them to forgive us if we hurt them. In Matthew 7:12, Jesus gave us what many call the "Golden Rule." He basically said, "Treat others like you want them to treat you." If every person in the world would do that, the world would be a better place to live. If you agree, then put it into practice. As we treat others with kindness and respect, they’ll do the same for us, and for others, and it will spread. It has to start somewhere.

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My Blogs
https://teddylynn.blogspot.com
https://teddylynn.wordpress.com

© 2018 Teddy Lynn – All Rights Reserved

My books are available in paperback and digital format on Amazon @ 
https://www.amazon.com/Teddy-Lynn/e/B01MZDB6L6