A MAN ON THE EDGE

It’s one fifteen in the morning. Chris is startled from sleep by a blood-chilling scream. By the time he gathers his senses, he realizes the scream came from his own mouth. The dream again. The same dream, over and over, for years. A better description would be a nightmare. This one is not as bad as some of the others he has, almost nightly, but this one keeps coming back. The sweat burns his eyes as he tries to catch his breath, and he wonders, “What’s going on with me?” He won’t get much sleep for the rest of the morning. Six a.m. will come, and he will be so tired he won’t be able to function properly all day.

That’s the way it’s been for several years now. The meaning of many of his nightmares is perfectly clear to Chris, but he doesn’t have a clue about this one. Maybe that’s why it haunts him. Maybe he needs to understand. He just doesn’t know. What he does know is that it’s not normal. He knows that everybody doesn’t dream the same dream over and over, again and again, year after year. He wishes to be normal. He wishes he could get some sleep.

The lack of sleep, and the pressures of work, along with a thousand other problems, have led to anxiety and depression, which have given rise to other problems, both physical and emotional. All this is having a negative effect on his relationships with his family and friends, and it’s affecting his performance at his job, as well.

Now, he lies in bed, tossing and turning, trying desperately to get back to sleep. His mind just won’t rest. It won’t even slow down. One thought jumps to another, and another, and then another until they all run together. Finally, after hours of restlessness, Chris finally falls asleep. Less than an hour later his alarm goes off. He hits the snooze to rest a few more minutes. By the time he gets awake enough to move, he realizes he has overslept.

Running late again, he fights his way through the thick rush of morning traffic. Finally, he makes it to work. The morning wears on slowly, and he is bombarded with paperwork. He has several moments where he almost walks out, never to return, but he perseveres, and lunchtime finally arrives. Exhausted from lack of sleep, and drained from the morning’s toil, the last thing on his mind is food. All he can think about is closing his eyes and never opening them again. He goes to his car, sets the alarm on his watch for one hour, and quickly falls asleep.

An hour passes, and when the alarm on Chris’ watch startles him awake, he feels as though he had only just closed his eyes a minute ago. He drags himself out of his car and back to work for two more terribly long, agonizing hours. Quitting time finally arrives, bringing with it a breath of fresh air, and a sigh of relief. Still, Chris feels overwhelmed and drained of all his energy, so he drags himself to his car, and heads home for the day.

As he drives home, he thinks to himself, “There’s gotta be more to life than this. If not, why even go on living?” Just then, he looks up at the sky, and says out loud, “Why don’t you help me, God?” He spends the rest of the ride home talking to Jesus and hoping for some kind of answer, some way to feel better, some peace, some closure. “It has to get better,” he says, “It has to.”

Does that sound familiar in any way? It’s sad that, so often, we have to reach our lowest point before we call on God for help. He wants to be our friend and constant companion in all situations. In the good times as well as the bad. Many times a situation would have been resolved long before it escalated into something unbearable if we would only stay in constant communication with God, as Jesus did when he was on earth.

In today’s world, a close relationship with Jesus is what we all need to stay on the right track. We are being attacked on every side. We need his help to remain strong in the face of opposition. Christian persecution may not have affected you yet, but Christians around the world are being persecuted and killed every day. None of us can stand for God in the face of such evil acts unless we spend time, daily, in his presence.

Trust him (Psalm 9:10). Obey him (Luke 11:28). Pray without ceasing (1 Thessalonians 5:17). Give him all your burdens (1 Peter 5:7), and he will give you strength to face anything, and still be able to stand up for him and his truth. ---

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© 2012 Teddy Lynn – All Rights Reserved

Adapted for the book “Inspiration For The Journey” by Teddy Lynn © 2012-2016 All Rights Reserved

My books are available in paperback and digital format on Amazon @ 
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SELF-PITY

Have you ever heard of something called Self-Pity? Have you ever experienced it? Have you ever had a pity party? Webster’s dictionary says self-pity is “a feeling of pity for yourself because you believe you have suffered more that is fair or reasonable.” *

We don’t realize it when we’re feeling sorry for ourselves, but pity parties are very destructive, not only to ourselves but to everyone around us. Here’s why.

Self-pity drains us of our physical energy. It slows us down, and we lose motivation. It affects us emotionally and often leads to depression. It affects us spiritually as well. We don’t have the energy, or the desire to do the things God wants us to do. When we’re focused on ourselves we’re not thinking about others, so our relationships suffer.

I remember a day, several years ago, I started having pains in my chest. I also had trouble breathing. I didn’t know what was going on so it scared me to death. In a few minutes, I began feeling better and in a little while, it was like it never happened. A few days I experienced the same thing again. I thought I was having heart problems, so I went to the doctor. After a thorough examination and a stress test that I thought was going to kill me, I found out it wasn’t my heart at all. I was having anxiety attacks. When I better understood my condition, I was able to deal with it differently and the attacks became less frightening and easier to handle, and soon they were coming less often. Being informed about something helps us to deal with it more effectively.

Self-pity is something that everyone can and should live without. It’s really a tool of the devil. Not just a tool, but a weapon. The sooner we realize that fact, the sooner we can be on our way to deliverance from the oppression of Satan and his evil forces.

If you ever end up in a situation where you’re feeling sorry for yourself and throwing a pity party, here are a few things that will help get you back on the right track.

Think about Jesus and the sacrifice he made so we could be free from the power of sin and oppression. Don’t allow that sacrifice to be for nothing in your life. Both God, and Satan want our allegiance, and contrary to what some believe, we have to choose one or the other. It’s a daily choice, too, not just a one-time thing. Self-pity takes our minds off this fact and puts it on ourselves. Get your mind back on God.

Change your attitude about self-pity. Ask God to help you to stop feeling sorry for yourself. Ask him to make you sick and tired of it. Ask him to deliver you from it. Recognizing where self-pity leads, and what the end results can be, we must refuse to go down that road.

Refuse to dwell on bad thoughts and feelings. That’s a hard one, but once again, the answer is found in God’s word. Philippines 4:8 tells us to think about things that are true, things are honest, things are just, things that are pure, things are lovely, things that are of good report, and things that are worthwhile and worthy of praise.

When we do this, we will not have time for self-pity. We won’t even be thinking about ourselves and our problems when we give it all to Jesus. Kick self-pity to the curb. You know you need to. Just do it. You’ll be glad you did.

* http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/self-pity

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My Blogs
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https://teddylynn.wordpress.com

© 2015 Teddy Lynn – All Rights Reserved

My books are available in paperback and digital format on Amazon @
https://www.amazon.com/Teddy-Lynn/e/B01MZDB6L6